supermom culture

Supermom Culture: Why It’s Toxic and How to Avoid It in 2022

Last Updated on September 2, 2021.

The term “supermom” is often used to describe a woman who has it all – an amazing career, great kids, and happy marriage. But the truth is that this image can be toxic for women and their families. Supermoms are not only expected to maintain everything on their own but they also get judged by other moms who do less than them. The best way to avoid supermom culture? Support each other.

What is a supermom?

Supermom is a term that was coined when we started to have moms that were trying to do it all. Supermoms have it all and they are the ultimate parenting goal of today’s society- but what does this really mean?

I’ll tell you what: It means being perfect, doing everything perfectly. It means never taking any time for yourself, and never admitting defeat.

Supermoms are the ones that have to be on top of everything-from cooking dinner every night for their families to going back to school as full-time students during the day. They also need to keep up with all of their social media posts (because we know how important mommy likes are), and they need to be the perfect stay-at-home mom, while still being a good wife.

What is supermom culture?

We now live in a supermom culture where this idea of a do-it-all supermom is now the standard. Every woman is expected to try to be this perfect, well-rounded supermom who can take care of everything. We are expected to keep up with all the social media posts. We have a never-ending list of things that need to be done by tomorrow’s deadlines.

RELATED: How to be a successful stay at home mom.

The problem with supermom culture

What is wrong with that? A lot of things! Supermoms are always fighting an uphill battle and never getting anything done 100% correctly. They struggle every day just trying to keep up with all their responsibilities, which leaves them feeling exhausted and ashamed.

This is what a successful supermom looks like: she doesn’t have time for herself, can’t remember her own hopes or aspirations because there’s never any downtime to think about them; all the creativity that used to go into making delicious dinners has been replaced by boxed macaroni and cheese; finding something cute for her children to wear for picture day is a challenge because she never has time to go shopping; and when the kids finally get into bed, it’s only so that mom can spend hours catching up on housework, studying, or working.

This culture creates impossible standards where we are supposed to be perfect at everything all of the time. It makes us feel like we’re never enough.

RELATED: How to say NO to house guest for your own sake

supermom culture
supermom culture

How to let go of your supermom mentality

The best way that you can avoid this toxic image is by recognizing it for what it really is. It’s a pressure-filled, impossible lifestyle where success means some of the time and not all of the time. You don’t have to be perfect at anything so stop trying.

This toxic image is impossible to maintain. And if you are feeling constantly overwhelmed then this may be an indication that something has gone wrong somewhere in your life. Don’t feel bad for not being able to achieve the supermom ideal-it’s just a myth anyway!

If you want to avoid this culture and let go of your supermom mentality, try the following:

  • Take a little time for yourself every day. This means making room in your schedule just to do something that you enjoy or take care of some small tasks by yourself instead of delegating them to someone else.
  • Let go and accept defeat sometimes; it’s ok if things don’t work out or if you don’t do something perfectly.
  • Don’t put so much pressure on yourself to be perfect and then beat yourself up when you’re not.

It’s ok to have a bad day, it’s ok to be mediocre sometimes, and it’s absolutely fine if you can’t multitask your way through every aspect of your life.

RELATED: How to Set Boundaries with Toxic Parents (aka Bad Grandparents)

The Bottom Line

Supermom culture is a toxic image where the ultimate goal of parenting in today’s society is to be perfect, do everything perfectly, never take any time for yourself and never admit defeat. This impossible standard creates a pressure-filled life that every woman has to try to achieve in order to avoid feeling ashamed. But don’t worry: it’s just not possible to achieve this standard. So, what can you do? Try to take a little time for yourself every day. Let go of the expectation that you need to be perfect at everything all of the time.

What You Should Do Next…

1. Snag Our Connected Parent Challenge

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2. Join Our Free Online Community

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3. Take a Free 60-Minute Parenting Webinar

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