what is conscious discipline

Conscious Discipline: Why It’s Beneficial and How to Use the Approach

Last Updated on September 2, 2021.

Many parents are looking for what they can do to create better discipline in their homes. For some parents, this means being strict and enforcing consequences. Others think it’s best to be more lenient with children and not have as many rules. What if there was a way that you could get what you wanted without having to choose between one or the other? There is! Conscious Discipline is a parenting philosophy that teaches how to use gentle guidance techniques when disciplining your child so that they behave in the desired manner. If you’re interested in implementing conscious discipline into your home, keep reading!

RELATED: Beginner’s Guide to Gentle Parenting

What is conscious discipline?

It’s a type of parenting that focuses on building empathy in children. It’s about setting clear expectations for what they should do while providing them with guidance to avoid negative actions. The approach also teaches parents how to give their kids positive reinforcement when they do what they’re supposed to do.

The goal of conscious discipline is not punishment. Instead, it’s about teaching kids how to regulate their behavior and make better choices. The approach also focuses on what parents can do when children are having difficulties with certain behaviors like tantrums or bad habits like whining, biting, or hitting.

The 3 Components of Conscious Discipline

Safety: Safety is what conscious discipline is all about because in the end it teaches children how to regulate their behavior without needing physical or verbal punishment. It also teaches them what they can do when they’re feeling scared or overwhelmed so that tantrums don’t happen as often.

Connection: With this component, the parent is trying to build a strong bond with their child through empathy and love. By taking time to talk about what’s going on in the child’s life or what happened that made them upset then they can work together to come up with solutions for how that situation could be handled better next time.

Problem-solving: This is what conscious discipline teaches children how to do. When there’s an issue with behavior like whining, biting, or hitting then the parent provides guidance and tells them what they should be doing instead of what they shouldn’t. The idea behind this component is that if kids have something productive to do when bad behaviors

what is conscious discipline
what is conscious discipline

How does Conscious Discipline Work?

Conscious discipline can be applied in a variety of ways depending on what the parent is trying to teach. For example, if one child is having an issue with tantrums, safety might be what they need or if another has been biting their siblings then connection and problem-solving would come into play.

Benefits of Conscious Discipline

  • It teaches kids what they should do instead of what they shouldn’t.
  • The approach encourages empathy and connection between parent and child, which is what every kid needs to feel loved in a safe environment.
  • Conscious discipline can be applied differently depending on what the problem behavior might be or what’s going on with the child at that time, which can be beneficial in the long run when kids have more difficult behaviors to deal with.
  • It’s a way for parents to take time each day to teach their children what they should do instead of what they shouldn’t so that there are no set punishments or rewards given—they just get guidance and support from their parents.

RELATED: What is Positive Discipline?

How can I use Conscious Discipline?

One of the most important things to do with conscious discipline is to set clear expectations for what kids should be doing. This can include what they’re supposed to say, or what kinds of behaviors are expected from them. The second thing parents need to remember is that they will have moments where it’s not what the child should be doing. That’s when they need to provide guidance and tell them what they should do instead of what they shouldn’t, like if their mood is angry then encourage them to say what’s making them feel that way or take a deep breath before saying something mean.

The Bottom Line

Conscious discipline is a great solution for parents who are looking for what they can do when their children have difficult behaviors or bad habits like biting, whining, and tantrums. It’s built on safe, strong connections between parent and child that build empathy through talking about what happens in the kid’s life to make them behave in what way as well as teaching problem-solving skills.

The best part is that this approach can be applied differently based on what the child needs at that specific time in their life. It’s a solution that doesn’t punish or reward with set punishments and rewards but provides guidance instead to help them get what they need.

What You Should Do Next…

1. Snag Our Connected Parent Challenge

Are you ready for more activities to build a rock-solid bond with your kids? Try our Connected Parent Challenge! It’s 15 Days of 15 Minute activities that are sure to improve your connection, diminish bad behavior, and create lasting memories. Plus, I’ll deliver more amazing parenting strategies to your inbox weekly (don’t worry, unsubscribe any time!).

2. Join Our Free Online Community

Connect with like-minded moms (and dads!) in our free online community. You’ll find a plethora of resources to help you through your parenting challenges. Plus, you’ll find me there! And I’d love to connect.

3. Take a Free 60-Minute Parenting Webinar

Do you need actionable strategies right now? Register for this free 60-minute webinar titled How to Get Kids to Listen, Without Nagging, Yelling or Losing Control. You’ll walk away with parent-tested tactics to get your kids to listen starting today.

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